Why is Texas the "Lone Star" state?

It was rated out of five.

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Which art piece won the Texas Muhammad cartoon contest?

Two chalk outlines.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb in Texas?

They can't. There's a wall.

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Who can watch an R rated movie but not a PG?

Batman

What's the highest rated hotel in the world?

Aushwitz, 6 million stars.