Why is the magnet on medication?

Because it's bipolar

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Why are magnets so arousing?

They're very attractive.

Why is the magnet on medication?

Because it's bipolar

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What medications do I take?

I'm not sure. The names on my neighbor's prescription bottles are ridiculously long

What do you mean I can't drink alcohol with this medication?

You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.