Why isn't my hand 12 inches?

Because then it would be a foot

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Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

Why did the foot smile?

He was toe very happy. Jesus that is awful.

What did Plaxico Burress say when he read Colin Kaepernick's Tweets?

Man, this guy just keeps shooting himself in the foot".

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What do you call something that you do to your self with one hand?

A Selfie!

How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

12 Inch Jokes More 12 Inch Jokes

What do me and Subway have in common?

12 inches

What's white, hard, and 12 inches long?

Nothing.