How can you tell if your goose is depressed?

It's feeling down.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Who was that on the phone Fred?

Fred: No one important. Just some man who said it was long distance from Australia so I told him I knew that already and put the phone down !

How can you tell, with 100% certainty, that no intelligent alien life exists that we know of?

Because if it did, we'd have sent foreign aid by now.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

What's the normal amount of hair to mail someone?

I feel like this is a lot of hair I'm mailing to someone

What do you call a cat that has boils on its skin and can't feel it's toes?

A leperd

Goose Jokes More Goose Jokes

How do you get down off an elephant?

You don't. You get down off a goose.

Why didn't the recently single goose lose her job when she made a mistake?

Because she had one heck of an ex-goose