How do I look?

I just came back from the beauty salon.... Husband - Well. Was it closed

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did the elephant say when it saw the Chihuahuas coming down the road?

Look out for the mice!

Why didn't Kevin from Home Alone call the cops when the burglars came around?

He was running a trap house.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why do proctologists like Facebook?

It's another chance to look up old friends.

What is that you're having for lunch?

Me: fruit salad H: That's funny, it looks like a sangria. Me: huh, weird *sips fruit salad*

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why did the woman turn to her husband and say "now who the hell would dump such a nice sofa out here in the woods?

She was looking at a bear and thought it was a sofa due to the four legs.

What do you call a women who always knows where her husband is?

A widow

Beauty Salon Jokes More Beauty Salon Jokes

How do I look?

I just came back from the beauty salon.... Husband - Well. Was it closed

Where'v you been all day?

At the beauty salon" "Were they closed! "