How do pirates measure rope?

In yarr'ds.

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Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

Where was the pirate when he was hit in the crotch?

Menard's!

What does the pirates 5 trailer and the iPhone 7 have in common?

There's no jack

Measure Jokes More Measure Jokes

Why are you prodding me with that ruler?

Im measuring your patience"

How do you measure a Lego minifigure's shoe size?

In square feet.

Rope Jokes More Rope Jokes

How do you get a goth down from a tree?

Cut the rope

Why did the boxer sprinkle cocaine on his exercise rope?

He wanted to practice the rope-a-dope.