How do you tell if Lady Gaga is dead?

You poker face!

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Why didn't Hannibal Lecter have any friends as a kid?

He was told not to play with his food.

What's the difference between Limburger cheese and my friend Ted?

One is white and stinks, and the other is cheese. (As told to me by the UPS guy)

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Why did Lady Gaga wear seashells to the VMAs?

Because B-shells were too small.

How do you annoy Lady Gaga?

Poker face.

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How do you annoy Lady Gaga?

Poker face.

How do you tell if Lady Gaga is dead?

You poker face!