How many seconds are there in a year?

Twelve

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Year Jokes More Year Jokes

What's Irish and stays on your back porch all year?

Patty O'Furniture

What did the bread do after it had been oppressed for many years?

Rye-ot

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What do a marriage and superglue have in common?

They both form a bond in seconds, last (ideally) forever, and are dissolved by alcohol.

Why did Mary Magdalene have an affair with Jesus?

She heard about his second coming