How much for a drink?

The bartender replies, "For you No charge."

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you call a pirate who is lost at sea and has to drink his own pee to survive?

Aarrrrrrr Kelly!

What do teenage terrorists drink?

Smirnoff ISIS

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

When someone says "It is what it is," I reply, "Isn't it?

so we can both sound useless.

How can I buy the New York Times?

He replies "Ask my wife. She'll tell you how you do it.

Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!

Why the sad face?

asks the bartender. "I got fired."