What are we going to do about the new abortion bill?

The politician replied, "Shhhhh -- just pay it."

This joke may have profanity.

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How does Germany pay for all these refugees?

Krautfunding.

What's the worst part about working in a glory hole?

You only get paid in tips.

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Where do you see yourself in 10 yrs time?

Same as now - in photos and mirrors," I replied

When one points and asks his friend, "Is that statue a foot?

To which his friend replies, "No, it's about four and a half feet."

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Why doesn't God want to argue with Satan?

Because Satan has more politicians to help him.

What is it called when a politician craps his pants in a Honda?

Civic doody.