What did the Scotsman say when he ripped his trousers?

Och noo, me troosers!

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Scotsman Jokes More Scotsman Jokes

How many Scotsmen does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Scotsmen don't change light bulbs it's cheaper to sit in the dark

What's the difference between Mic Jagger and a Scotsman?

Mic Jagger says "Hey you, get off of my cloud". A Scotsman says "Hey, McLeod! Get off of my ewe!"

Rip Jokes More Rip Jokes

What do you call it when you get ripped from steroid use?

Ill-gotten gains

What do you call a bad hairdresser who is also very expensive?

A rip-off.

Trouser Jokes More Trouser Jokes

Why should you always take two pairs of trousers when you play golf?

In case you get a hole in one!

What did capital 'O' say to capital 'Q'?

Hey, put that thing back in your trousers!"