What did the thermometer say to the other thermometer?

A: You make my temperature rise.

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Rise Jokes More Rise Jokes

What would happen if you ate yeast and polish?

You would rise and shine.

What do you call a rising poll?

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Thermometer Jokes More Thermometer Jokes

How is a thief like a thermometer on a hot day?

A: They are both up to something.

How are you feeling?

The thermometer responded, "0K."