What did the vegan give the homeless guy?

A lecture.

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Vegan Jokes More Vegan Jokes

How many vegans does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to get up on his high horse and another to chastise the first about oppressing horses.

How do you know when a vegan gets to the party?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

Homeless Guy Jokes More Homeless Guy Jokes

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas?

Very, very hungry.

How do you know a homeless woman is menstruating?

If she's only wearing one sock. (This joke brought to you courtesy the homeless guy outside my local 7-11.) Edit: tweaked the punchline.

Lecture Jokes More Lecture Jokes

What do you get when Sleeping Beauty gives a lecture... What do you get when Sleeping Beauty gives a lecture on the Northern Lights to the people of Wonderland?

Aurora boring Alice.

What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?

A hemogoblin. I came up with this during lecture after a dyslexic moment, thought someone may like it.