What do a carjacker and pervert have in common?

They're always cracking in-ya-windows!

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Crack Jokes More Crack Jokes

What's the difference between an egg and Elliot Rodger?

An egg gets laid before it cracks.

How do you make a peanut laugh?

A: You crack it up.

Pervert Jokes More Pervert Jokes

What's four inches long and drives women crazy?

A 100 dollar bill you pervert!

Why did the pervert buy 16.5 pints of salsa?

2 gals 1 cup(http://www.reddit.com/r/Canning/comments/yyhsp/my20triptothelocallatinmarketnetted165/)