What do dwarves use to cut their pizza?

What do members of secret societies use when they get a head cold?

An Illumi-neti pot

Why do happy people like to sleep in late?

Because they aren't mourning people. I just made this up!! Could you all help me with the wording? It feels like it could be a little better I just don't know how to word it differently while using the same "mourning" pun as the punch line.

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

What is wrong with people?

Have they never had pizza

Why is it so hard to order pizza from me?

I'll update with the hilarious punchline later...

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What do you call a budget that's cut short from the middle?

A midget.

What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.022x1023 pieces?

Guacamole.

Little Caesars Jokes More Little Caesars Jokes

How do Mexicans cut their pizza?

Little Caesars

What do Romans use to cut their pizza?

Little Caesars.