What do elves learn in school?

The elf-abet.

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What does Santa teach his elves?

The Elfabet!

How many elves does a german santa have?

Elf.

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What's the first step in getting accepted to carpentry school?

Submitting a stool sample.

What's the best way to get home from school?

Don't go to school.

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Why did King Kong join the army?

To learn about gorilla warfare.

What's the difference between E.T. and a Mexican?

E.T. learned English and went home.