What do Viagra and Disney World have in common?

A one-hour wait for a two-minute ride

This joke may have profanity.

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What do you call Captain Forte and his sidekick Piano?

A dynamic duo! This joke came to me in my delirious state after hours of band camp practices.

Why did the blind driver have no hands?

He was reading road signs at 50 miles per hour

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What are you doing crawling into school ten minutes late ?

Pupil : Well you told me never to walk into school ten minutes late !

How do you get a woman to stop texting you?

Reply to her message within a minute

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What kind of government does Disney World have?

A plutocracy

What do characters at Disney World and strippers have in common?

No touching!

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