What do you call a Chinese man with a bad internet connection?

Hi Ping

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What Journey song to Chinese people sing at funerals?

Don't Stop Bereavin'

What kind of dogs are full of Chinese scientists?

Yellow labs

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What did the Chinese man say when ophthalmologist told him he had a cataract?

No, I have a Rincoln Continental!*

What do you call a Chinese man allergic to dogs?

Starving.