What do you call a obese fortune teller?

A fortune teller, you FPHer!!!

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What do you call an obese psychic that works at a bank?

A four chin teller

What's a similarity between obese people, and my relationships with women?

They don't work out.

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Where did the fortune-teller go on her vacation?

To Palm Beach.

Where do fortune tellers buy their clothes?

Sears.