What do you call fans of the new iPhone 7?

Pod people.

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What song do you sing if you're not a fan of Christmas?

Sigh-lent night

Why did the fan blow itself?

Because it was turned on!

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Why are the new iPhones so skinny?

To match their hipster owners' jeans.

Why are you letting people touch your new born?

I don't let people touch my new iPhone