What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

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What did the sergeant say to the corporal?

I need to see your privates.

Why couldn't Ron Weasley make a Horcrux?

Because you need a soul for that.

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How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

What is the life motto of a Frenchman?

No gain no pain.

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What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

What do you get when you cross a stock broker, a detective, and an alligator?

An investigator.