Gain Jokes

What is the life motto of a Frenchman?

No gain no pain.

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What does Apu say when people leave him to browse reddit?

Thank you, Karma gain

Why doesn't Hermione keep her money at Gringotts?

Offshore investment gains a better return.

What is worse than blacking out after a crazy night and losing money?

Blacking out and gaining money.

How do you get an anorexic to gain 25 pounds?

Marry her.

How did robbers gain entry to steal from Miley Cyrus?

They came in like a wrecking ball.

What did the ruler gain a reputation for while campaigning?

Straight talk.

Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces?

For the chance to gain some experience in the service.

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.

How do you make a girl gain weight?

Marry her.

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What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

How do you do it?

Me- "It's easy, I just gain weight."

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Frenchman Jokes More Frenchman Jokes

Why was the Frenchmen racist?

Because he was a bigette.

How many Frenchmen does it take to stop a Semi Truck?

Apparently, 84 isn't enough.

Miley Jokes More Miley Jokes

What did Miley Cyrus' dancing instructor tell her to do?

Hometwerk

What's the best part of having Miley Cyrus over for thanksgiving dinner?

Unlimited twerky

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

What did they start calling Kim Jong Un after he shed 60 kgs in weight?

Kim Jong Un what you thought it was Slim Jong Un? Sorry but you are not allowed to make puns on your supreme leader's name in North Korea

What do you call a rabbit who lifts weights?

A jacked rabbit.

Wreck Jokes More Wreck Jokes

What's black, and breaks into houses?

A wrecking ball

What happens to your car insurance if you don't notify them that you've wrecked a car?

I don't know, but it's not wreck-amended.

Volleyball Jokes More Volleyball Jokes

Why do volleyball player want to join the armed forces?

For the chance to gain some experience in the service.

Why doesn't Jesus play volleyball?

All those spikes hurt his hands

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

What did the elephant say?

What did the elephant say when it was pulled out of a pit by the Balls? Thank you Mr. and Mrs. Ball!

How good are you with Microsoft PowerPoint?

I Excel at it." "Did you just make a Microsoft Office pun, sir " "Word." Edit: thanks u/SteveJobsiGhost

Jared Jokes More Jared Jokes

Why isn't there a Jared's for boys?

Oh wait, there is.

Why does Jared love 6-inch subs?

He doesn't, he likes 14-year old girls

Crazy Night Jokes More Crazy Night Jokes

What is worse than blacking out after a crazy night and losing money?

Blacking out and gaining money.

How does an Alabama girl know shes in for a crazy night?

Her daddy says he wants her in bed by ten.