How do you make a girl gain weight?

Marry her.

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Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What do you call a girl between two posts?

Annette.

What's 16 centimetres long and makes every girl happy?

A 500 bill.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Why don't melons marry on a whim?

They cantaloupe.

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

What's the best way for an American to lose weight?

Gamble in British currency.

What kind of trophy do I get every time I lift weights?

Hypertrophy!

Gain Jokes More Gain Jokes

What is worse than blacking out after a crazy night and losing money?

Blacking out and gaining money.

How can you tell your boyfriend has gained weight?

You fit into his clothes.