What does his wife call it?

Microsoft.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did the stoner take his wife to court?

He wanted to get joint custody.

Who plays those kind of jokes anymore?

You're scaring my wife. She's only 12, jeez.

Microsoft Jokes More Microsoft Jokes

Why did Microsoft go straight to Windows 10 and skip 9?

Because Windows 8 9.

What's Justin Timberlake's favourite Microsoft Word alignment?

Justified. (NB Sincerely hoping that this is actually original)