What gets longer the more you cut it at both ends?

A ditch.

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End Jokes More End Jokes

Why is a burning candle like being thirsty ?

Beacause a little water ends both of them !

How is prison like quidditch?

The game ends when they catch the snitch

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What is the difference between Emo teenagers and your lawn?

Your lawn won't cut itself.

What did the drunk Chinese customer say to the bartender?

No have to cut me off. Fall off barstool by myself. end metajoke

Ditch Jokes More Ditch Jokes

What did the cow say when she got hit by a car?

Moo." What did the cow saw when she fell into a ditch? "Moo." What did the cow say when she fell onto the electric fence? "Moo." What did the cow say when she got hit by a train? "Why does everything always happen to meeee?" Protip: My dad wrote this joke for me when I was six.

What's black and blue and laying in a ditch?

A: A guitarist who'd told too many drummer jokes.