What do you call a fake psychic who was found out and now shoots up in ditches?

A high medium low

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What do you think about the coming battle General?

God knows it will be lost. - Then why should we go for it - To find out who is the loser.

Why couldn't Beethoven find his music teacher?

He was Haydn

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What does a dentist do in his free time?

Shoot lions.

What do you feel when you shoot a terrorist?

The Marine shrugged and replied, "Recoil."

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Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch?

A: Her blinker was on.

What gets longer the more you cut it at both ends?

A ditch.