What is a proctologist's drink of choice?

Two fingers of whiskey.

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Finger Jokes More Finger Jokes

Why are anorexic people cannibals?

Because they're always putting their fingers in their mouths.

What do you call a judge that doesn't have any fingers?

Justice Thumbs

Choice Jokes More Choice Jokes

Why is it that New Jersey got all the toxic waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?

New Jersey had first choice.

What is the chupacabra's breakfast of choice?

Goatmeal.

Whiskey Jokes More Whiskey Jokes

Why did god invent whiskey?

x-post /r/drunkjokes) So the Irish would never rule the world

What is the difference between a beautiful dress and a bottle of Whisky?

A beautiful dress can make one girl look gorgeous... A bottle of whiskey can make all girls look gorgeous.