What looks like red paint but is dry?

Dried red paint

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What is this alien looking thing in a wig trying to sing?

Oh wait thats Nicki Minaj. Why would an alien in a wig pick Nicki Minaj as a name

What's the worst thing to hear during a prostate exam?

Look! No hands!

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What's the difference between blue paint and red paint?

The color. Yes, this is an anti-joke. Downvote please.

What looks like red paint but is dry?

Dried red paint

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What gets wet as it dries?

Texas after a drought.

What does the Pope use to dry his hands?

Papal towels.