Who me?

Ohhh, I'm just driving around town, painting "free candy" on the side of creepy looking vans.

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How did he get from Afghanistan to Iraq?

Iran (He ran). Thought of this when looking at the world map, sorry that it's terrible.

What if you go missing?

How do you expect us to find you if you look like beyonce on Facebook.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What did one fish ask the other?

So how do you drive this thing

Why are there so many jumpshots in the WNBA?

Because women can't drive

Town Jokes More Town Jokes

When will there be a woman in the White House?

A: When Hillary leaves town.

How do cows go from one town to another?

they cowmmute.

Paint Jokes More Paint Jokes

Why do elephants paint their toenails red?

So they can hide in strawberry patches.

Why do we paint Easter eggs?

Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!

Creepy Jokes More Creepy Jokes

Why was the haunted mansion self conscious?

Because it got a lot of creepy stairs. FML.

What is it about tall creepy louisiana swamp dwellers that makes them naturally glow?

Their bayou loomin' essence