What mammal dies after it mates?

Anyone that goes near my wife!

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did my wife say to me?

I want a divorce

What makes a grown man cry?

Watching his wife and children die before his eyes.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What do you do with an infected chemist?

You try to Curium. If that doesn't work and he dies, then Barium

How did Steve Jobs die?

From PC

Mate Jokes More Mate Jokes

Why do owls not mate when it's raining?

Toowet Towoo

How the hell did you get a body like that?

he asked. "Thanks," I said, "That's very flattering." He said, "Not really mate."