What's the longest you've stayed in bed?

I usually sleep ON the bed. #DadJoke

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why did the man bring his bed with him to the hospital?

It's because he heard hospital beds have a high mortality rate.

What do you call a police officer that doesn't get out of bed?

An under cover cop.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What do you call an Irishman who slept out on the lawn all night?

Patty-OFurniture

What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with?

A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why didn't Princess Diana have very many friends on Xbox Live?

All she does is stay on the dashboard.

How do I stay in shape?

I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it

Dadjoke Jokes More Dadjoke Jokes

What kind of a joke does a black person not get?

Dadjokes

What's the longest you've stayed in bed?

I usually sleep ON the bed. #DadJoke