What was the engineer's reaction to his wife being too heavy?

Cantilever? (can't I leave her)

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why do people keep a picture of their wife and kids in their wallet?

To remind them why there's no money in it

What's the difference between a deaf person and my wife?

I don't know.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

Because he was Snowden

Why did the cannibal leave the restaurant?

Because he got cold feet.