Why are divers always so nervous?

Because they're always under pressure!

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Pressure Jokes More Pressure Jokes

Why has Venus been so distant lately?

Mars answers "shes been under a lot of pressure and has really bad gas"

What did the piston say to the freely expanding gas?

No pressure

Diver Jokes More Diver Jokes

Why do divers fall backwards into the water?

If they fell forwards they'd still be in the boat.

What did the diver say to the oyster?

I want that pearl! Don't be shellfish!