Why are you telling me this now?

Vader: Luke: Vader: I need a kidney.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the doctor tell the panda bear after the results of his child's paternity test came back?

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the results are a bit grizzly.

How do you tell if someone is a safety engineer?

They are wearing suspenders and a belt.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

How long do you need to put the turkey in the oven for?

Mine was dead within 30 minutes (credit goes to my Grandma)

Why did the astronomer break up with his girlfriend?

He just needed some space.

Luke Jokes More Luke Jokes

Why isn't Luke on the poster for The Force Awakens?

He's a bit Shywalker. I'm so, so sorry everyone.

What did Luke get for pulling Darth Vader's face mask off?

A 15 yard penalty.

Kidney Jokes More Kidney Jokes

Why did the alcoholic chop off the little boy's legs?

He wanted his *Kidneys*.

Why are you telling me this now?

Vader: Luke: Vader: I need a kidney.