Why can't Stevie Wonder see his friends?

Because he's married.

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What is the president's favorite vegetable?

BARACK-oli. Courtesy of my friend Abraham.

Why did the lady with multiple personality disorder share her food with a friend?

Because Sharon is Karen.

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What's the opposite of running away and getting married?

Anteloping.

How does one turn a fox into a pig?

Marry her.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder see his friends?

Because he's married.

Why can't Stevie Wonder see his friends...?

Because he's married. (I'll see myself out).