Why did Harry Potter buy so many golden snitches?

Because they were only a quideach

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What are the first words Jared Fogle's girlfriend said to him?

Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies, sir?"

How do you know if the camera you just bought was made in Asia?

If the shutter makes a "crick" noise.

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Why is Harry Potter so popular in prison?

Because he catches all the snitches!

What do Harry Potter and Kermit the frog have in common?

Hogwarts!