Why did the boy take a ruler to bed with him?

A: To see how long he slept.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

How is my wife doing?

Doctor: I'm so sorry. The accident has left her in a vegetative-like state and I don't think she'll ever recover. She can barely move her limbs, if at all, and will be confined to a bed or wheelchair without the ability to ever walk again. You'll need to care for her 24/7, clothe her, feed her, bathe her, and she'll have no control of her bladder or bowels. Again, I'm so, so, sorry... ..... ..... ..... Just kidding! She's dead.

Why did the Italian get thrown out of the hotel?

He said "I wanna two sheet onna the bed".

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?

You rocket

Why did the boy take the ruler to bed?

He wanted to see how long he slept.

Boy Jokes More Boy Jokes

How can you tell an ant is a boy or girl?

Throw it in water If it sinks = girl ant If it floats = buoyant

Why does the boy could not bend his knees?

because he had no knees

Ruler Jokes More Ruler Jokes

Why do ruler manufacturers make a big thing about them being shatterproof?

Was there a ruler shattering epidemic that necessitated this

Why do we call rulers "Your Highness"?

because that's what they measure.