Why did the python return his pants?

They were too constricting.

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Why, Bro?

B1: Men with no pants... Fighting for a belt... WTF

What are calories?

Little elves that tighten your waistband on your pants a little every night

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Why did the cows return to the marijuana field?

It was the pot calling the cattle back.

Why did Napoleon return from exile?

He needed more Elba room.

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Why did the python do national service ?

He was coiled up !

What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy?

Oh no not snake and pygmy pie again!