What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy?

Oh no not snake and pygmy pie again!

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What do you call an arrogant convict coming down the stairs?

A condescending con, descending.

What did the Doe say when she came out of the woods?

I'm not doing that again for two bucks.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What is headache ?

5 minutes talk to wife.

How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting?

Talk in your sleep.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Who says there's no life on Mars?

Why only today they found a Beagle!

How many tax auditors does it take to find a $1.00 mistake in an expense report?

Three. One to find the mistake and two to discuss the significance of it.

Cannibal Jokes More Cannibal Jokes

What did the cannibal have for lunch?

Baked beings (beans).

What do cannibals put in their soup?

Ramen! Before you judge harshly, I would like to state that this was invented by a six year old, all on his own, no coaching.

Python Jokes More Python Jokes

Why did the bodybuilder go to the vet?

Because his pythons were sick

Why did the python return his pants?

They were too constricting.

Pie Jokes More Pie Jokes

What did the cake say to the Pie?

That's sweet, ain't it?"

What did the Pie say when he failed a math test?

How did I get these simple questions wrong! I am so irrational!"

Chop Jokes More Chop Jokes

Why did the alcoholic chop off the little boy's legs?

He wanted his *Kidneys*.

Why did the butcher die ?

Because he chopped off the wrong sausage.

Pygmy Jokes More Pygmy Jokes

What's the difference between a a women's track team and a tribe of pygmy's?

One is a cunning bunch of runts and the the is a running bunch of.....nevermind.

What's the difference between a tribe of pygmies and a girls cross country team?

One is a group of cunning runts.