Why did the storm trooper decide to buy an iPhone?

Because he couldn't find the right droid he was looking for.

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Why were Wrigley, Doublemint, and Orbit watching CNN?

To find out the latest on gum control legislation.

What did Julius Caesar ask when finding a color to paint the Senate?

Ecru, Brute "

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What does the rude barista say to the customer in a coffee shop?

I cant decide whether you are a fruitcake or a doughnut!

How do cities decide who gets to be in charge of wastewater management?

They hold a runoff election.

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What's it like being a grown up?

Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly

Where do you buy Pikmin from?

The Oli-Mart