Why didn't the conspiracy theorist make his irreverently named pet sleep outside?

Because 9/11 was an inside dog.

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Why did 0.81 recurring die?

Because he was 9/11.

How much steel can a dank meme melt if a dank meme melts steel beams?

9/11 beams

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What did the giraffe say to the conspiracy theorist?

Nothing, giraffes aren't real.

What's the difference between a skeptic and a conspiracy theorist?

You wouldn't believe me if I told you.