Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippy?

He was too far out, man.

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Why is it best to be bitten quickly by one mosquito?

Because an itch in time saves nine.

What does a sandal do on Sunday's?

It saves its sole.

Lifeguard Jokes More Lifeguard Jokes

How did your first day as a lifeguard go?

Me: "Amazingly well, thanks. Everyone was so friendly and waving at me."

What did the lifeguard say to the hippie?

You're too far out, man.