How did your first day as a lifeguard go?

Me: "Amazingly well, thanks. Everyone was so friendly and waving at me."

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Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Why thank you... are you single?

Girl: No, I am a dentist.

Why do the French have so many civil wars?

So they can win one every now and again. (Thanks, John Cleese! This was too good not to share.)

Wave Jokes More Wave Jokes

How do you get a one-armed monkey out of a tree?

Wave at him

What does it take for a soldier in uniform to pick up a girl?

a smile and wave!

Lifeguard Jokes More Lifeguard Jokes

What does a lifeguard and a manager of a Curves have in common?

They both watch whales.

Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

He was too far out, man.