Why did the cellphone go to court?

Because it was charged with battery.

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Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

How old?

Woman: "Thanks, she's 34 weeks. Do you have the time " Me: "Sure, it's 972 minutes past midnight."

How about Epidural Anesthesia?

I was like, 'Thanks, but I already picked a name.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

How much storage do you need for a mouthful of dirt?

A Terra Bite

Why do I need the life vest?

Me: If you have to ask, you might not need one.

End Jokes More End Jokes

How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two - One to put it most of the way in, and one to give it an interesting twist at the end.

What's a word that starts with "u" and ends with "w"?

Cloning.

Charge Jokes More Charge Jokes

What's the difference between a bull and a Samsung Note 7?

I'm not scared when the bull charges

What was the condiment stand charged with?

with a deadly weapon.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you call that which barks during the day and floats during the night ?

Your grandma's jaws

When do the leaves begin to turn?

The night before a test.

Battery Jokes More Battery Jokes

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries

When should you charge a battery?

A: When you can't pay cash.

Cellphone Jokes More Cellphone Jokes

Why did the cellphone go to court?

Because it was charged with battery.

Why didn't the cellphone attend the wedding?

He heard the reception was going to be terrible...

Court Jokes More Court Jokes

What did the lawyers say when they finished their basketball game?

Court is adjourned

Why was the Energizer Bunny tried in court?

He was charged with battery.