How awful do I look?

Him: You always look beautiful. Me: Do I need to put makeup on Him: Maybe just a... *stare* Him: No.

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?

Haloumi!

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?

Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why did the flume ride need repairs?

Because it got waterlogged.

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu?

If you have bird flu you need tweetment. If you have swine flu you need oinkment.

Makeup Jokes More Makeup Jokes

Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

Why are you putting on makeup, Mommy?

Me: So I look less tired. 3: Why are you tired Me: Because I'm a mom. 3: Why are you a mom Me: 3: