Why are you putting on makeup, Mommy?

Me: So I look less tired. 3: Why are you tired Me: Because I'm a mom. 3: Why are you a mom Me: 3:

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why don't I like trees?

They look kinda shady to me

How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It takes four. One to screw in the bulb, and three others to watch and say, "Really dude, you look huge!"

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

How do you get out of Sunday school?

You tell your mom you're Sikh.

What do you call a cow on no legs?

Ground beef. What do you call a cow on three legs Tri-Tip. What do you call a cow on two legs Your mom.

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

3 SQL statements walk into a NoSQL bar. Soon, they walk out

They couldn't find a table.

What is the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl?

You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball

Makeup Jokes More Makeup Jokes

Why does Mom wear makeup?

Me: To look pretty. 5: But she's already pretty. Me: Aww. 5: Dad, you should wear makeup.

How awful do I look?

Him: You always look beautiful. Me: Do I need to put makeup on Him: Maybe just a... *stare* Him: No.

Mommy Jokes More Mommy Jokes

Why does Mommy always say no?

Well Son, if Mommy said yes all the time you'd have 20 more siblings.

Where did you learn to do that?

Don't wipe boogers on Mommy's pillow! Wipe it on Daddy's