How did Jesus stay in shape?

Crossfit

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Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Whenever I'm in trouble, I think: what would Jesus do?

Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for three days.

What did Jesus say to the Mexicans?

Don't do anything until I get back

Shape Jokes More Shape Jokes

Why is Toblerone shaped like a triangle?

To fit in the box.

Why are contortionists always angry?

Their work usually has them pretty bent out of shape.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

What did the Chinese fisherman say to his at-risk son?

Stay on the junk, and you'll go far.

Crossfit Jokes More Crossfit Jokes

What workout routine did Jesus stick to best?

Crossfit

Why was Jesus I such good shape?

Crossfit. Why did the Romans hate Jesus so much? He wouldn't shut up about crossfit.