Why did the man break up with his girlfriend who had a lazy eye?

Because she was seeing somebody on the side.

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What if aliens are responsible for global warming?

And this is just their way of breaking the ice.

What do they do in Alabama when their car breaks down?

Build a house next to it.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man who invented the bum shaking machine realize when he turned it on?

It twerked.

Why did the man invest in the kilovolt battery?

He thought it had a lot of potential.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Why doesn't the guy with OCD ever get laid?

Because when he turns his girlfriend on he has to turn her off again three times.

What "c word" describes my girlfriend and why I'm not getting any?

Carpaltunnel

Somebody Jokes More Somebody Jokes

What do you call somebody who is content being average sized?

A happy medium.

What do you call somebody after you give them a noogie?

A knucklehead.

Lazy Eye Jokes More Lazy Eye Jokes

Why did the man break up with his girlfriend who had a lazy eye?

Because she was seeing somebody on the side.

Why should you never date someone with a lazy-eye...?

Because you never know if they're seeing someone on the side.