What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an unwilling agnostic, and a dyslexic?

Somebody who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question whether or not theres a dog.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why did the man cry when he was cutting up onions?

Onions" was his dog... D:

What does a plankton name its dog?

Phyto.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you build a flea circus?

You have to start from scratch.

When are YOU going to start having kids?

Me: When are you going to stop

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you think Mozart is doing right now?

Decomposing.

What do you call a black person who smokes?

An e-cigger. I'm going to hell for thinking of this.

S Jokes More S Jokes

What is red... And smells like green paint?

Red paint! Whats green, and smells like red paint Green paint :) Can't believe how many time I switch to the second, and they don't get it!

Whats the difference between dawn and dusk?

d(sun)/dt *facepalm* I'll see myself out.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why didn't the engineer cross his own bridge?

Because he didn't truss it.

Why did the Cook cross the road?

because there were "Too Many Cooks".

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

Why did the kid cross the playground?

To get to the other slide. Edit: spelling.

What's the difference between Donald and a piece of fruit?

Oranges have thick skin. Let the downvotes fly, people! You've only got one! Edit: Did not expect this joke to get this good of a reception. Thanks, guys!

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

How does a deaf Gynecologist communicate with his patients?

He reads lips.

Why is r/Jokes only text, and forbids external links?

Because black people can't be offended if they're only reading jokes.

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What do you call an Irish woman who stays out all night?

Patty O'Furniture

How does the Easter Bunny stay healthy?

Eggsercise particularly hareobics!

Good Jokes More Good Jokes

What's the best part about going to a concert in Paris?

Free Shots

What's the best part about a Fight Club joke?

The punchline.

Somebody Jokes More Somebody Jokes

Why did the blind man walk into a wall?

Somebody shot his dog

What do you say when somebody else has ruined your joke?

RIP post

Share Jokes More Share Jokes

Why didn't the shrimp share his food?

He was a little shellfish

What did the pig do when a beetle landed in his feed trough?

He ate it quickly before the others could ask him to share.

Question Jokes More Question Jokes

Who's there *The Kgb *The kgb who?

Slaps person) we will ask the questions.

How much for a consultation?

Three questions for $150 bucks." "Kinda steep, isn't it " "Yeah, now what's your last question."

Infinite Jest Jokes More Infinite Jest Jokes

What do you get when you cross a philosopher, an insomniac and a dyslexic?

A guy who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog. Infinite Jest, by DFW

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an unwilling agnostic, and a dyslexic?

Somebody who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question whether or not theres a dog.

Insomniac Jokes More Insomniac Jokes

Why did the cop shoot the insomniac?

He was resisting a rest

What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac?

Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog.

Unwilling Agnostic Jokes More Unwilling Agnostic Jokes

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an unwilling agnostic, and a dyslexic?

Somebody who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question whether or not theres a dog.

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an unwilling agnostic and a dyslexic?

You get someone who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question of whether or not there's a dog.

Dyslexic Jokes More Dyslexic Jokes

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic, and an agnostic?

Some guy sitting up all night wondering if there really is a dog

What do you get when if you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic and an agnostic?

A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.

Torture Jokes More Torture Jokes

What do you get when you cross an insomniac, an unwilling agnostic and a dyslexic?

You get someone who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question of whether or not there's a dog.

What do you call the feeling of being a tortured insect?

Antagony