How do dolphins send messages?

By sea-mail.

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How do you know if a blonde has been sending e-mail?

A: You see a bunch of envelopes stuffed into the disk drive.

How do mountainers send messages?

By ski-mail.

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What's the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.

How do you get a Samsung owner to throw their phone out the window?

End your text with "this message will self destruct in 10 seconds"

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Why did the dolphin get a fair trial?

Because Habeas Porpoise.

What do the dolphins and the post office have in common?

Neither deliver on Sundays.